5 years ago today I became a mother for the very first time! I can’t believe that Jon and I have a 5 year old. It’s madness. We always say that we should have a 7 year old at this point because that’s how long it took us to get pregnant and have a pregnancy that stuck around. I guess Hudson just wasn’t ready when we decided we were ready to be parents. He had to make an entrance and make us sweat it out a bit. The whole process of getting pregnant was just a roller coaster of emotions. Basically it was almost 3 years of me blaming my body for not being able to do something it was meant to do. Many days and nights were spent in tears and when we finally got pregnant and then a miscarried I pretty much broke down. It was heart breaking. The future that I had envisioned was gone in what seemed like seconds. After that miscarriage we took a bit of break. I couldn’t handle the ups and downs anymore. I needed to be Jon and Camila again not the couple with unexplained infertility. Life went on. We went away to Costa Rica in January and then I went to High Point Market in March. When I returned from my trip I finally felt ready to start trying again. So, I went to the infertility Doctor to start the process all over again. I remember breaking down in the Doctor’s office in tears, because I wanted a baby so badly and I was terrified it wasn’t going to work. The Doctor calmed me down and explained that I was young and we would figure it out. I had to schedule some sonograms to see at what stage of my cycle my eggs were at before we could start anything. A couple of days later I realized my period was late and I just felt a bit odd. So, I went out and got a pregnancy test and voila I was finally pregnant. It took me a while to feel comfort enough to actually get excited, but after hearing and seeing the heart beat numerous times I finally let it sink in.

5 years ago I woke up to pee at around 6 in the morning. Then I went back to bed and within seconds literally heard a POP! My water had broken! I showered and then went in to the hospital to check my progress. I was 3 centimeters when I arrived so, they submitted me. I was in labor 7 hours (3 of those hours being pushing) and then we had Hudson.

From the moment I found out I was pregnant I was already in love with him. When he arrived I was completely obsessed. He was perfect and delicious and he was all mine.

I must admit at the very beginning I was very much a momma bear and didn’t even want anyone else to hold him. It just took so long for him to finally get here that I wanted to be the one to constantly hold him. We spent many days snuggling together and I have taken a million and one photos of him. I’m in awe of the person he has become. He is such a little man. He talks like crazy, remembers everything, loves to learn new things and is an amazing big brother. Those baby days are long gone and while I miss them so much I’m so proud of the kid he become.

Now I have a little man that is so smart, funny and loving. He is pretty much perfect, but I know I’m a bit bias. I love him fiercely and I’m so proud to be his momma.

Happy 5th sweet Hudson! Thank you making me a mother.